If any of you who have not known yet, I used to work for two private companies before I decided to run my own startup. The feeling of being an employer is totally different from being an employee. Here are the differences:
Loneliness: I used to work at Sabay Digital Corporation whose number of employees is about 150 people at that time. I worked in a big team, so whenever we try to solve problems, there are a lot of ideas, which were given by each of them. Additionally, what makes us became a family at work is how we suffered the failure together and how we celebrated the success with so much cheerful noises. How about now? I need to struggle so much to find solutions on my own no mater how big or how small the problem is, and I can only share my idea with my one and only partner. Also, when we succeed any work, we celebrate it only 5 members. Sometimes, I feel sad and weird to celebrate the big achievement with only a few people. I feel very sorry to my teammates as they feel super lonely to cheer the great moments.
Fire comes from my heart: when I work for others, there are so many external factors that push me to work hard. First of all, it comes from my team leader. He guided me so well that I felt I learned so much back then and this keeps motivating me to work harder because I believed the harder I work, the better result I would have in the future, and the happiest moment was when I was able to deal with any work assigned. Secondly, having good teammates to work with made my life so interesting and fun. They just made my day no matter how sad or how happy I was, they were always with me. This encouraged me to come to work because I was happy to be with them. Additionally, I could survive with my own salary. In contrast, as I become a leader on my own, I realize that building the fire inside your heart is the only way to produce good results. Without having that strong inner commitment, I could lose everything in just a second.
Be my own solutions finder: I have no boss to guide me all the time anymore. I have to do so much self-learning and I admit sometimes, I feel very tough to walk without having a mentor. I need to learn a lot of new things to make my startup profitable and scalable. I have a lot of questions in my head, but I cannot ask anyone. Startup ecosystem in Cambodia is very weak, comparing to other countries even our neighbouring countries can do better in building ecosystem in their countries. I keep searching for an answer to those questions on my own, and that is really hard. Yet, I have never given up searching for an answer. It is just the beginning of my startup journey.
How about you? Are you running a startup? How do you feel to work alone or in a small team? Share me your thoughts!
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